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Tokon Rakhmanova, who is Kyrgyz, was born in 1940 in the village of Sosnovka, [1] near Kara Balta, Kyrgyzstan. She worked as a farmer and then as a janitor. “The concept of love was not widespread in our time. By tradition, our parents married us. If we disobeyed our parents, it was considered shameful for our family,” she said. Azat Nepesov interviewed her in Sosnovka on March 15, 2009.

There was no school in our village. We went to the next village to study. It was a long way; it took a lot of time to walk there. That’s why I finished only four grades. After that, I was needed at home. The post-war years were very difficult. A lot of husbands and sons did not return from the front. In each village felt the shortage of men’s hands. I helped my parents watch the children and run the household.

My father was a stockbreeder and I often helped him when I was a child. We raised karakurt sheep and often took them to pasture in Talas and Susamyr. He died when he was 62 years old. My mother worked for most of her life in the beet fields and died when she was 72 years old. They had 10 children, including me, and three of them have died.

My parents were strict when I was growing up – and it wasn’t only my parents. Back then, we didn’t go to concerts, to the cinema, or to other cultural events. Our only entertainment was playing games with the neighborhood children. There were four very popular games: altyn-baka, [2] joluk samay, [3] and shakek samay. [4] I married early and, after that, I didn’t have any free time, since I was always occupied with my children and my family life.

My native language is Kyrgyz, but I know a little bit of Russian. I had to learn it when I worked as a milkmaid, because many of my colleagues were Russian. At that time, many people aspired to learn Russian, but since I am not educated, I could not learn Russian well. Besides, the people around me communicated only in Kyrgyz. I would like to know Russian because, when you go to the city or the market or the hospital, Russian is necessary.

I am religious. I am a Muslim. I pray and I go to mosque. I read the Koran and do davat. [5] One of the duties of adults is to teach children basic Islamic principles. In the Soviet period, there were no mosques – I did not go to mosque. But my parents prayed at home. When I was young, I did not pray. I started to pray only in the past two years or so.

In the Soviet period, Islam did not spread for two reasons. First, we were allowed to have only one religion: Communism. Muslims were despised and sometimes even pursued as enemies. Therefore, practically everyone conducted their religious affairs at home, where no one could see. Second, we did not have enough time. I mean we physically did not have time. We spent all day in the field.

I remember when the first TV arrived in our village. It was 1965. When I first saw it, I was surprised. But I liked to watch concerts and Indian movies and, because of these interesting programs, I began to watch TV. But I still liked to do embroidery better – it is my favorite form of entertainment.

During the war, I was small, so I don’t remember much. I remember only that I was sent to the field to work as a shepherd. All our people hated Germans and when they talked about the war, they always said: “We should exterminate them!” Why was there so much rage? Because we lost so much in the war. Many people lost family members. In each family there were funerals. Also, we had never seen Germans and that is part of why we hated them so much.

I remember when Stalin died in 1953. We learned about it from the radio. There was a solar eclipse that day and everyone was frightened and sat silently. Many people thought the eclipse was directly connected with the loss of their great leader. It was a big loss. From what I remember, there were three days of mourning. Nobody worked or went to school. Many people cried. Then, Khrushchev came next. The only thing I remember about the Khrushchev era was that sometimes there was famine because of poor harvests – and then there was no bread. Khrushchev has a bit of a negative association for me.

I never wanted to live in the city. I like it here [in the village] with my relatives. Besides, without an education and without speaking Russian, there aren’t many opportunities for me in the city. Certainly, I have gone with my relatives to large cities for concerts and such, but I never had a desire to stay. I believe one’s older years should be spent at home.

The concept of love was not widespread in our time. By tradition, our parents married us. If we disobeyed our parents, it was considered shameful for our family. Anyway, I married. My husband worked on a collective farm as a foreman. Later he worked as the supply manager at a school. He died in 1985, when he was 52 years old. I have grandsons now. One of them left to Ireland recently and he sends us money.

I worked a janitor at a school for 25 years. I also worked on a beet farm and as a milkmaid. At that time, the state really supported us. There were never shortages of drinking water, irrigation water, or harvesting equipment – the collective farm provided everything.

After we became an independent country, the collective farms were broken up and the land was distributed to individuals. Now there are four farms in our village. It was better when there was one big collective farm. Now we cannot hope for any help from the state. Everything depends on us. Being involved farming and stockbreeding has become very risky. There are problems with the irrigation system and there is an acute shortage of fertilizers and other materials.

Productivity fell sharply after independence. There was hunger. People lived in fear. We did not know that would happen the next day or the day after. We were not divided into rich people and poor people; before the 1990s, everyone was equal. But from the first years of independence, there were rich men who had appropriated the lands and equipment of the Soviet Union.

We all still grow things like cucumbers, tomatoes, carrots, and other vegetables, just as we did in the Soviet days. Sometimes it is necessary to go to the market to buy something. My favorite dish is beshbarmak. I also like Uzbek dishes like lagman and manty. [6] People used to drink bozo, which is prepared from corn and is a little bit alcoholic. Back then, people did not drink alcohol the way they do now.

Now, because of unemployment, many young people leave the country to find work in other countries. Unemployment has created problems in the village like alcoholism and hopelessness. So the young people hear that someone has left and earned a lot of money and then they leave, too. They frequently come back sad. Some of them even regret leaving their parents and their homes to earn small sums of money.

It used to be that the man was the head of the family and everything depended on him. Now the roles have changed a little and women are more active. The woman now goes to the market more, manages things more – basically the woman is in charge of the household finances. This change is related to the fact that many men have left to work abroad, so now women have to perform men’s duties. Those men who remain here are often alcoholics.